Loving husbands is a biblical command which points to the reality that love can be learned.

Teach the older women to be quiet and respectful in everything they do. They must not go around speaking evil of others and must not be heavy drinkers, but they should be teachers of goodness. These older women must train the younger women to live quietly, to love their husbands and their children, and to be sensible and clean minded, spending their time in their own homes, being kind and obedient to their husbands so that the Christian faith can’t be spoken against by those who know them. - Titus 2:3-5 (Living Bible)

Love is the most distinctive Christian virtue. According to the apostle John, it was love and concern for man that motivated God to sacrifice His only son, Jesus Christ:

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. - John 3:16

He also said that it was love that would be the most characteristic quality of Jesus' followers:

By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another. - John 13:35

Jesus claimed that love was the highest and greatest commandment:

Master, which is the greatest commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. - Matthew 22:36-40

It is in God’s love for us and our love for Him that must be the source of our love for all others. We receive God’s love knowing that we are undeserving and we desire to love him back. We stay close to Him; we listen to him; we sit at His feet; and what does He say to us? Love your neighbor. Out of our love for Christ and His love for us flows a desire to love our neighbor.

Just who is my neighbor? My nearest neighbor is my husband, my spouse, my life companion. My ministry to Christ is to love my husband and to be a devoted companion to him and a suitable helper. All of this is to the glory of Christ and the spread of the Gospel, ultimately.

And so it follows that in his letter to Titus, Paul, the apostle of Jesus Christ, wants the young wives to be taught to be wise and to love their husbands.

The letter is full of exhortations to good works and the wives are exhorted to engage in the good work of the home first: to love their own husbands and children.

All of this follows on the Genesis account of the creation and purpose of woman.

The woman was created as a helper and a companion to the man as together they fill and bring order to the earth (Genesis 2:18) The husband was commanded to “cleave” to his wife and the two were to become “one flesh”, to live in unity (Genesis 2:24) Jesus reiterated the Genesis mandate and added that no one should separate the husband and wife. (Matthew 19:3-9. Mark 10:2, Luke 16:18)

And so it fits in with the whole of scripture that Paul tells the older women to teach the young women to love their husbands.

The word translated “love” in the text (Titus 2: 3) in the original Greek is philoandros, (philo,* fondness for, andros, man). Philo, when placed in front of a noun has the sense of being a fan and a supporter of something or someone, a devotee, as in “philokybos” a lover of dice-play (philo, fondness for, kybos, dice). So the wives are instructed to be fond devotees and fans of their husbands, literally “husband-lovers”.

Love is the cement of the home.

Solomon, the wisest of the ages, said:

Every wise woman buildeth her house; but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands. -Proverbs 14:1

The home must be cemented together with love. A house without love, be it castle or palace, is not a home. Love is the life of a true home. A house without love is no more a home than a body without a soul is a person. Love builds the family relationship. Hate tears it down. It is my choice whether to love or to hate, whether to build or to destroy.

Every marriage has growing pains, but it is through marriage that we grow up.

Repeat and renew your vows before each other and God. When doubts and fears arise it will do you good. And by doing this your minds will grow together, contented in that love that can be stronger than death.

Love can be built strong and firm enough to withstand all the storms of anxiety, defeat, and floods of fear and grief that life brings against it.

Ten ways to show love to husbands:

We have been given this great ministry of loving our husbands. What does that mean? What most speaks love to our husbands? In the next few weeks, I’m going to suggest ten ways to love a husband:

Accept him.
Admire him.
Adapt to him.
Appreciate him.
Fulfill his sexual desires.
Learn to care for him.
Be loyal to him.
Be his companion.
Communicate with grace.
Pray for him.

God is love, and He created man and later a woman for a helper. He planned that they should cohabit as a duet. This coexistence would require love; so God in his infinite wisdom gave instructions for the older women to teach the younger women to love their husbands. All of this points up to the fact that loving can be learned. It must be taught by word of mouth and by example. The aged women have a serious responsibility to the younger women in this very important role.

I hope you will join me for future posts as we explore these ways of loving husbands.

I love you all!

-Amy Laurie